There was a day when I’d slip Side A of my cassette tape into the deck, sprawl my awkward teenage body out on the couch, open up a magazine and dream. I dreamt seemingly impossible, yet fantastically amazing dreams of what I envisioned my life would be like. Some day I’d be a professional mountain biker shredding down epic mountains, winning trophies and earning fame. Or maybe if that didn’t work out, I’d be designing and programming the latest and greatest video games for Sierra Entertainment. Of course I’d have a fallback career as an architect. People would flock to the revolutionary houses and buildings I had designed, I would be the next Frank Lloyd Wright or Frank Gehry.

I miss those days of dreaming. Impossibilities didn’t feel impossible. I had freedom to imagine that I could do or become anyone I wanted. I knew the dreams might not happen, but that never squelched the joy of dreaming. But realism struck, or was it cynicism, maybe a bought of maturity? Either way, I stopped letting myself dream, for a very long while.

What this last year has taught me is that dreaming is important. Dreaming is what helps us get beyond ourselves and what the world is telling us about our limitations. But even if a dream never happens, there is something special and magical about it. There is life and joy in the attempt and the process. In light of that, instead of the typical, super practical New Year resolutions, I offer you my big dreams. Dreams that occur when I tell the practical side of my brain to shut the **** up. I urge you to stop, relax, slow down and do a little dreaming with me.

The Shop

For some reason I’ve always loved the idea of owning a shop. Do I know how or have any experiencing in doing this? No. But when I was younger I dreamt about owning a bicycle shop, then it became a coffee shop, and now it has morphed into a running shop. I love interior design, technology and what makes a shopping experience enjoyable (for me at least). The curation aspect of owning a shop also intrigues me. Most new and hip gear cannot be found at a typical running shop and needs to be discovered online. If this shop ever came to be, it’d be the best running shop in the world, I’d also settle for all of New York State.

Relationships

People are hard and I’m an introvert, which means people are extra hard for me. Unfortunately, this does not lend itself well to being a good friend, husband, father or son. If I had the choice I’d rather be alone, but even so, I still long to feel loved by others. Over time I have stopped trying, stopped caring, stopped even thinking about how I can be a good friend. Most relationships die from lack of nurture or proximity and my dreams of what a friendship might look like have fizzled with cynicism. It is safe to say that I have sucked at this my whole entire life.

As sappy as this sounds, I long for friendships that are deep and meaningful where I express thankfulness, interest, care, and love in a way that fills others up, while also being able to accept love back. Time is short, possessions are meaningless, people are timeless. We are all longing for true love.

Transcendance

If you’ve never longed for something spiritual I’d encourage you to start dreaming in this department. I’ve been following the ways of Jesus for many years now and one thing I know for sure is that it is a life-changer for me. Most of the time, being transformed by the teachings of Jesus have been slow and uneventful, but there have been moments in my life when I experienced something well beyond any human reasoning or understanding.

God cannot be controlled, but I dream of more of these experiences. More specifically, I’ve been fascinated by two stories in the Bible. One story is about Samuel who hears the literal voice of God. The other story is about Stephen who has a vision of God while he’s getting murdered (I know, slightly morbid). Both of these people had experiences that were mystical and fantastical. Whether I will experience anything like it (minus the death part), I still long for that type of experience.

Physical

Two years ago I ran my first marathon, this past year I ran my first ultramarathon. I have discovered that I love and find great joy in activities that involve being outside, adventuring and pushing myself beyond what I think are my body’s physical limits. One race that has caught my imagination for its sheer grit and exotic nature, is the Marathon Des Sables. Why would I want to run this race? I have no idea, but for some reason it allures me. On a slightly smaller, cheaper and more likely to accomplish scale, I’d really love to run the Long Path Trail from Albany to NYC.

Keep Dreaming

That’s it, those are my dreams. I have no idea if any of these things will happen, but maybe at the right time they will. Or maybe, they will change into something new. How about you? What do you dream of? I’d love to hear your dreams!