Oh 💩, Literally
If all you learned about running was from what you saw on Instagram, you’d think that running is only perfectly executed runs in gorgeous locations, run by beautiful people. The reality is, some runs really suck and sometimes, the entire day leading up to those runs suck. Not to mention, I look downright sweaty and gross by the end of any run.
My day at work started off with everything going wrong. When things go wrong, they usually go very, very wrong. It can quickly become a high-stress situation that can leave me feeling jittery and shaking (not to be mistaken with the affects of overdosing on coffee). After being on the phone diagnosing and fixing issues all day, I finally hit a stopping point, closed my computer for the day, and went running. I was imagining that I’d have an hour of pure running peace, where I could forget my problems and relax. Unfortunately, I got the opposite.
If you are not a regular runner, or don’t run long runs, you might be shocked to find out that us runners sometimes have to 💩 at very inopportune moments. Many times this isn’t a big deal because bathrooms are generally close by. Unfortunately for me, I was in the middle of nowhere and had no possible chance of making it anywhere that had a toilet. This run was quickly taking a turn for the worse.
Finding the most secluded tree that I could find and relieving myself, I realized that the only wiping material I had was dead, crumbling leaves. It is not easy to wipe with dead, crumbling leaves, nor do they stay intact like fresh green leaves. To make matters worse, once I was done, I slipped and fell down the hill I had climbed up and re-injured my wrist (a completely different story for a different time). Completely angry, annoyed and in pain I start running back home. 20 minutes later, wrist hurting, crumbled dead leaves caked to my 🍑 and feeling the opposite of peaceful, I made it home. Surely nothing else could go wrong.
Turns out, something else could go wrong. Shortly after I got home one of the kids got sick and on their way to the toilet, literally five steps away from said toilet, they projectile vomited everywhere 🤮, all over the floor. Not just once, but twice, covering the entire bathroom floor 🤦♂️. After Cleaning up a lot of puke, the day finally came to an end and I crashed hard, dreaming that tomorrow would be a better day.